The trouble with being the only boy in a house full of girls is you can’t get away from all the girly stuff, and you end up being way too familiar with things like Barbie and Tinkerbell. And Winx. And Dora. And Babysitters Club. And H2O.
The list is extensive, so basically you find you have to compromise a lot.
“Bruce,” whispered Tracey.
“Mmm?” I mumbled, managing to look her way by moving only the bare minimum of muscles – mainly those attached to my eyeballs. I was standing at the coffee pod machine waiting for it to heat up and I didn’t want to get distracted and delay my first coffee by a second or two.
Tracey was waving me into the lounge room. Or at least attempting to. “You need to see this.”
“No, I don’t,” I assured her.
Even in my foggy, pre-coffee state I could sense this wasn’t going to end in my favour.
“Come on,” whispered Tracey, and I followed her out of the kitchen because marriage is all about sacrifice and compromise and not upsetting the missus.
We crept into the next room and listened to the conversation in the girls’ room, where all five of our littlest kids were playing.
“Hello,” said Miss6’s voice. “What are you doing today?”
“I’m going to fight!” came the voice of Master8.
“Wouldn’t you like a cup of tea first?” asked Miss10.
“Or watch Dora?” suggested Miss4.
“Maybe something to eat would be good,” agreed Master8.
“I’ll set the table,” said Miss10.
“And I’ll play with the horsie,” added Miss4.
“I hope you’ve got enough food for my friend too,” said Master8. “We’re very hungry from all the battles.”
“He’s very cute,” said Miss6.
“He hates being called cute,” said Master8.
I couldn’t take it any more. I had to stick my head through the door to see what was going on.
On the floor, all the kids, including Miss2, were sitting around playing with dolls and doll furniture – almost all of it was pink.
“Awww, you’re all playing Barbies together,” I said as we entered the room. There must have been twenty Barbie dolls scattered about. Maybe thirty. Plus the Barbie Dreamhouse, Barbie Van, Barbie Plane, Barbie Horses, Barbie Carriage, Barbie Car and a gazillion Barbie accessories. “That’s so sweet.”
Everyone grinned up at us. Except Master8.
“I’m not playing Barbies,” he told us rather defensively, and held up a stuffed Pikachu toy. “I’m playing Pokemon.”
You keep telling yourself that, son.
Yep, no one does compromise like our little man. Or denial. He’s going to find marriage a breeze.
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When not over here, Bruce hangs out at his Big Family Little Income Facebook Page.
”Raising a family on little more than laughs.”