Sowing The Seeds Of Love


“This is nice,” I said to my wife this morning.

She’d snuck back into bed with me and snuggled in so we were spooning. I put my hands around her and she clutched my arms and held them tight to her chest.

This was the first Saturday in weeks we’ve had nothing on, so I slept in this morning. It was really nice and lazy and I’d only just considered the idea of going in search of caffeine when Tracey showed up and pinned me down with her loving embrace. Stealing a few moments to enjoy my wife’s warmth was a super nice way to end my sleep-in before my cup of super nice way to start the day.

The day was off to a fantastic start. Or so I thought.

I attempted to release my wife but she clutched me tighter. I couldn’t move.

She must really be enjoying my cuddle, I thought, settling in and giving her a squeeze.

We do a lot of snuggling, but usually I’m allowed the freedom to move my hands around. That’s part of the fun. This was a little different. I wondered what was going-

“Oh!” I exclaimed as my brain caught up. “Of course. It’s Valentines Day. Happy Valentines Day, Tracey!” And I gave her a kiss. Or I tried to, but I couldn’t move far enough to get my mouth to her face, so I basically just put some lip spit on a patch of her hair.

But Tracey didn’t react the way I thought she would to my Valentines wishes.

“Now, I want you to remember you love her,” Tracey smiled at me over her shoulder.

“Love who?” I asked, a bit lost.

“You can come in now!” Tracey called out the door, and a guilty looking urchin poked her head in the room. Miss7 was looking for all the world like this was the last place on Earth she wanted to be.

“Do I have to?” she whispered loudly to her mum.

“Don’t be scared,” Tracey assured our daughter. “He can’t get away. I’ve got him in a vice grip. Tell him what you’ve done.”

Miss7 took a deep breath.

“Daddy,” she said, “you know how you really like peaches?”

“Yes,” I said. I’d purchased a box of peaches yesterday. It cost me $35. I’d sacrificed my beer budget so the family could have them – such is love.

“Well, I do too,” she said.

“Don’t tell me you’ve eaten them all,” I stammered, disbelieving. We were going to need to go to the shops to stock up on toilet paper.

“Oh no, Daddy,” she assured me, suddenly becoming animated. “I’m going to grow my own peach trees in our back yard.”

“That’s a great idea,” I told her. Then I whispered in Tracey’s ear, “What’s wrong with that?”

“Wait for it,” my wife said.

“So I’ve been peeling the peaches to get the seeds.”

And she’s got lots of seeds.

Happy Valentines Day, everyone. Whatever you’re doing I hope it’s with someone who loves you so much when they hear you like fruit they want to grow you an orchard.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a couple kilos of peach flesh to eat my way through.


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“Raising a family on little more than laughs”


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