We are on high alert here in the Devereaux household.

There’s definitely an air of expectation about the place. Likewise there’s an air of urgency and an air of anxiety. We’re keeping an air of panic in reserve. There’s also an air of excitement, but that’s just the kids at the moment. Tracey and I are hoping to join them and breathe a lungful of that in closer to morning.

It’s 8.30pm and I’ve just had a coffee.

The goods are ready for the drop, the targets are all confirmed in their bunkers and Joint Chiefs of Staff have just come out of their final, top secret briefing behind a locked bedroom door.

“We don’t go in until we can’t see the whites of their eyes!” is the sort of thing we didn’t say.

We cannot fail. There are no second chances.

This is not a drill!

Our mission – come in under the veil of darkness, drop our payload and get the hell out of their before the ‘enemy’ knows they’ve been fooled.

You might be thinking, ‘but surely this isn’t your first Easter?’ True. This is my 21st covert Eastertide operation.  But the build up to this year’s Egg drop has been one unmitigated disaster after another.

It’s all the Tooth Fairy’s fault. The silly, guilt-winged git. She’s missed the last three tooth pickups – all since Christmas! She’s managed to wiggle her tutued bum out of it, but not being tied to a particular day or date, she’s got that advantage.

There is no second chance with The Bunny. It’s opening night or nothing. And ‘nothing’ would shake the very foundations of our imaginary fortress. If any of the three pillars, Santa, Fairy or Bunny, should falter the others cannot hope to keep up the pretext of existence.

And we will not mess with that holy of holies – Christmas!

Everything is ready and we are Go! Go! GO! for midnight. Zero Hour.

Good luck everyone. God willing we’ll all make it back with our imaginary friends in one piece. Bless you all and have a great Easter with your loved ones.

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