“I have a secret”

Secret Big Family-3

In a big family like ours, sometimes the best way to get heard isn’t to yell but to whisper. Something which Miss4 seems to have cottoned onto recently.

“Daddy,” she’ll whisper, coming up to me while I’m watching a movie or enjoying a coffee on the balcony. “Daddy, I want to tell you a secret.”

“What is it?” I’ll ask, already smiling.

I’m smiling because not only because I know what she’s about to say, but because of the way she says it. She’ll stand on a chair next to me and lean in, cupping her hands around my ears and hiss so close to my ear that her lips touch my ear and send me into a giggling glob of goosebumps while saying, “I love my big family.”

It’s super cute.

Which is why, when we had some friends over for a BBQ and as they left she told the wife she had a secret, I was a bit chuffed and my face took on that awww, my child is so sweet expressionNext to sleeping through the night and wiping her own bum, this is my favourite thing Miss4 does at the moment.

Our youngest daughter cupped her hands around our friend’s ear and I waited for the inevitable giggle and goosebumps. But instead of crying out for sheer cuteness the woman guffawed and gave me a strange look.

“Is that right?” she said to Miss4.

“Nope,” said Miss4, shaking her head and looking quite solemn.

This wasn’t making any sense. I mean, did she just say she didn’t love her big family?

“Make sure you tell your father,” our friend called back over her shoulder as she went to the car. “I’m sure he’d love to know about that.”

You bet I wanted to know. We waved goodbye and I mustered Miss4 into the lounge room and asked if she had a secret for me.

She did.

“I love my big family,” she whispered. After my bumps ungoosed and I stopped giggling, I thunked hard then asked Miss4 if that’s the secret she’d told our friend. “No, that was a different secret,” she said.

Aha! She still loves us! Like I had any doubts.

“Well, can you tell me what the secret was you told her?” I asked.

Miss4 nodded, took on a more serious expression and cupped my ear again.

And suddenly I understood.

“I don’t have a penis,” she hissed.

Don’t tell anyone. It’s sort of a big secret around here. Apparently.

Secret Big Family-1

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Raising a family on little more than laughs.


  • Bruce, I too had 5 kids, thus a big family. Four boys and the a girl who I’m sure wished she had a penis when we pulled up outside the house and everyone was busting to go to the loo and the boys were able to relieve themselves on the (very prolifically flower producing) azalea plant at the front door. She had to wait until Mum managed to find the key and unlock the front door. Big families produce resilient and unselfish adults (I hope).

  • My oldest, who is now 21 , at the age of 3 during sunday family dinner with all the grandparents decided to announce “boys have penises and girls have vaginas”. Although his Vs weren’t totally clear and it came out Baginas. You could have heard crickets…

    • That’s both sets of grandparents thinking, “shit, he gets that from our side of the family” 😉

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