A Near Catastrophe


“Do you really need me to come with you?” I asked Tracey when the alarm started bleating at us at 4.45 this morning. “I can’t even convince my eyelids to separate.”

“I know,” agreed Tracey. “How about that bird this morning?”

“What bird?”

“You kidding me? There was a bird outside our window chirping and tweeting for twenty minutes,” she sounded really pissed off. “I can’t believe you missed it. I want a cat.”

“I don’t want a cat,” I told me wife. “They aren’t dogs.”

We have this discussion from time to time. I do understand the whole cat lovers thing, I just don’t feel it myself. For the last fifteen years the dogs of the world and I have been winning the argument (sorry, discussion?) here at home, but I sense this wasn’t going to be an easy argument to overcome. Jazz, our beautiful four-legged family member, although adorable, isn’t a bird dog.

Not that today wasn’t always going to be exhausting.

Tracey was doing a workshop with a super-photographer on the Gold Coast so we had a three and a half hour drive ahead of us and needed to be there at 9am sharp. This was the reason for the ridiculous wake up time.

Grandma arrived to look after our older kids and get them to school, and we bundled our youngest two into the car and took off.

Sixteen hours later we pulled back into our driveway, knackered. Tracey had done the workshop while I took the little ones shopping and to a park. We were both shagged. We started emptying the car of kids and a day’s worth of junk food paraphernalia. We were beat.

“Sorry I nodded off on the way home,” apologized Tracey. “I’d have been fine if it wasn’t for that stupid bird. I want-”

“-I know, I know. You want a stupid cat.”

We’d just about finished cleaning out the car when Tracey stopped short in front of me on the step to the balcony.

“What’s that?” my wife asked suspiciously. She was pointing at the roof of the kids’ cubby house, which is situated about ten meters from our bedroom window.

I looked over.

“Birdseed,” I told her. There was about a cupful of it spread out over the tin.


“I put it there. I thought it might be nice to attract some birds to…our…hou……oh, shit.”

On the bright side, it turns out we don’t need a cat 🙂

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Bruce Devereaux hangs out at his Big Family Little Income Facebook Page

 ”Raising a family on little more than laughs.”


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