I Can’t Keep It In
byWARNING: This story has some imagery which isn’t for the faint of heart or weak of stomach or people who don’t like to say eww out loud. But it is funny.
WARNING: This story has some imagery which isn’t for the faint of heart or weak of stomach or people who don’t like to say eww out loud. But it is funny.
Can you guess what was that one thing which had me springing out of bed markedly earlier than any of the previous sixteen?
“I’m going to school tomorrow,” Master10 announced tonight. He’d been home for two days with stabbing pains in the stomach which even had us at the hospital at one point.
Our daughter was wearing a bike helmet and in executing the hug had managed to headbutt her mum.
“Can I have everyone’s attention please!” I said at work, raising my voice when there were no customers in the branch. “I have something to say which you all need to know.”
The best way to get a break from the kids is to give them something to occupy themselves with. Right? I wish…
Tracey has been ‘a bit tired’ now for going on 10 years. I’ve always assumed it was the kids. Now I’m not so sure.
When I’m sleep deprived, I’m a mess. The synapses in my brain just don’t fire. What I say and what I hear don’t necessarily match reality. I hear about Winston Churchill, Napolean Bonaparte, Thomas Jefferson and Bob Hawke and how at the peak of their political powers they only required a few hours sleep a night and I can’t believe there haven’t been more wars.
“I got dickers!” Miss3 announced to her mum when we arrived home from the hospital at midnight. Being given stickers is the toddler equivalent of winning a chook raffle. It was all we could do to stop her from racing in and waking her siblings.
I’ve been sick this last week, which has been tough, but at least my family hasn’t deserted me in search of greener pastures.
I felt like a bit of a wally today because I had to be driven home from work.
One of my colleagues has been dragging herself into the office for a week despite sniffling and talking like she’s doing a bad Krusty the Clown impersonation.
Whereas I went home because I was dizzy. What a princess.