Seven kids. It’s a lot, you know. So you think by now I’d have more of an understanding about how the little buggers tick. I don’t.
The kids have wardrobes and boxes full of toys they never touch. Toys, I might add, they chose for themselves and had to have. But instead, what do they play with?
A few weeks ago I noticed the cushions from the lounge room were sitting in the window seat in our bedroom.
“Who’s brought these in here?’ I asked Tracey.
“You kidding me?” she wanted to know. I must have been because she was laughing. There was a pause while I quickly tried to work out the joke. I got squat. “They’ve been in this room since before the baby was born.”
The ‘baby’ turned one in January.
“Well, I’m putting them back where they belong,” I said.
“They’re a nightmare in the lounge room,” Tracey informed me.
“That’s where we bought them for,” I pouted. “I use them to nap on.”
Before Miss1 was born? She may have had a point. Still, I was on a mission.
A minute or two later I’d marched all six cushions out of the room and set them up on our lounge, where they were intended to be.
And I’ve been marching them back to the lounge several times a day ever since.
What is it about little square cushions which demands our kids’ attention?
I went to lie down today and watch Rise Of The Guardians with the kids and you know how many cushions I had there to tuck under my head? None, which is short for not a one. Usually there’s several strewn across the floor for me to trip on.
So I went looking. They weren’t in the kitchen or the dining room. They weren’t in our room. They were in Master8’s room. “There’s already several good, head-supporting pillows in his room,” I mentioned to Tracey in what can only be described as an exasperated tone. “What does he need the cushions for?”
“He was using them as stepping stones,” she told me. I am cursed with imaginative children.
But this wasn’t even the only cushion incident today. I sprung Miss1 lying on the kitchen floor using one as a pillow this morning and tonight, when I tried to restore the lounge room to it’s former glory once the kids were asleep, I went hunting and found one on our bed, where there’s so many pillows they’re a safety hazard on the floor if I have to get up in the middle of the night to go pee pee.
So for Christmas this year I’ve written myself a note: everyone gets a cushion.
“You could always just nap on your bed,” suggested Tracey. True, there’s already several good, head-supporting pillows there. But she’s missed the whole point.
“How am I going to pretend to watch the telly with the kids from our bedroom?”
Honestly. Sometimes I think she understands me less than I understand the kids.
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