Night Moves.

Our kids tend to be nearly as loud and active asleep as they are awake, having inherited sleep walking and talking from Tracey’s side of the family.

Asleep, Tracey’s Mum thinks she can lean out windows and call birds to perch on her hand, Mary Poppins style, and Tracey’s Grandad even took up sleep driving. Then there’s this wonderful story of Tracey’s parents finding my wife on all fours barking at a door one night.

Yep, the whole family is nuts.

And my good genes don’t seem to have had any effect at all at watering this down in our children.

One of my secret pleasures at the moment is sitting at my laptop watching QI episodes on Youtube. Because the kids’ bedrooms are within arms reach I tend to wear headphones and try to keep my guffaws to a reasonable level.

I was halfway through my second episode tonight when a shadow loomed over me. Tracey was standing beside me.

“Did you realize your daughter just walked past you?” asked Tracey when I took my headphones off. She hates it when I get so involved in my laptop the kids slip by me and annoy her on hers.

I immediately knew who she was referring to because Miss5 sleep walks habitually between 10 and 11 every night, which is when her bladder tends to need emptying. Unfortunately, when she’s sleep walking she doesn’t know where the toilet is and just tends to seek out a handy corner or pile of washing.

I generally chase her around the house, pick her up and plonk her on the toilet quick toot, and after she’s piddled she’s ready to fall asleep again.

Not to be outdone, Miss3 has just recently started the same routine, only not as regularly yet. Still, it did make me wonder if I needed to grab a mop.

“Did any of the other ones escape?” I asked Tracey. “We’d better do a head count.”

When all were present and accounted for I went back to watching Fry making Allen Davies look a bit simple when suddenly my wife was beside me again. This time her hands were on her hips.

“Did you take her back to bed?”

Um, I hadn’t. I kind of thought Tracey was handling all that.

“I assumed it was finders keepers,” I explained to her.

Shortly after I found Miss5 – she was sitting on the loo, slumped over and fast asleep.

One things for sure, when she’s older we’re going to need to hide the car keys. And maybe get her a lead.

sleep like a baby

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