There comes a time when you have to show a little faith in your kids and allow them to start their own interweb accounts on Facebook or Instagram and the like. It’s just hard knowing when that right moment is for each of these modern day milestones.
“The bloody girls have been using my phone to watch Youtube again,” I complained to Tracey.
My suggested viewing is full of girls named AlishaMarie, MyLifeAsEva, lisbug and MayBaby. Don’t these people have a spacebar on their keyboards?
“I don’t mind when it’s Peppa Pig or Barbie Life In The Dreamhouse or Frozen Eggs, because no one will think that’s me if they look over my shoulder, but this other stuff makes me look like a perve.”
“Firstly,” said Tracey over the top of her glasses, “we both know you’re the only one watching Barbie Life In The Dreamhouse these days.”
“It’s so funny,” I admitted sheepishly. “I love Closet.”
“That’s very telling.”
“I mean the character in the show.”
“Secondly,” said Tracey, getting back to the point, “it’s a whole lot worse than what you think. And by worse I mean funnier. She’s been entering competitions.”
I didn’t see the problem. I love entering competitions. Over the years I’ve won a heap of great prizes, like alcohol.
“Has she won any?”
“Oh, she won’t,” said Tracey. “That’s all part of the problem.” Sort of the other side of the same coin, it turns out. “She entered one the other day on Youtube. I think it was that Eva girl. She said things like I‘ve been stalking your page for ages. I love watching your videos. You’re beautiful and inspirational. I’d love to meet you one day!”
I immediately saw the problem. Her answer was generic and unoriginal. “She needs help writing her entries.”
But Tracey was shaking her head and chuckling. It seems that wasn’t the problem.
“She’s using your account,” said Tracey. “Those twelve year old girl answers have your forty-eight year old man’s face attached to them.”
So anyway, I’ve been mulling it over, and Miss12 will be thrilled to learn I think it might be time I let her have her own Youtube account. Unlike the one I could muster if the police ever come knocking, her mother has certainly put forward a very strong case.
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“Raising a family on little more than laughs.”