“And one more thing,” I said to the bloke behind the counter. “Do you have a donkey dick?”
Yes, I realise that sounds bad, but I can explain in just three hyphenated words: father-in-law.
Now our big beautiful bus is set up how we want it there’s just a few things to source and store before we head off on Friday.
A few things. I wish.
We’re madly crossing things off the list just as fast as we can think of things to add. Everything from bags for the leads to accessory plates for the bike rack to a hand held beater for making cakes to a modem solution for the internet.
On that last point, we’re going from 1000gig a month – which we regularly nearly hit – to just shy of 90gig.
There will be tears. Probably from the kids too.
One of the best ideas came from a mate of mine, Greg.
“Get yourself a set of hoses and belts for the engine,” he told me. “That way if you break down you’re not sitting around waiting for a courier.”
Considering a breakdown also means we’re without a home, it was good advice. Especially as it took nearly two weeks for the bits we needed to come from as far away as Japan.
And even then, it turned out one of the hoses is no longer available.
“Where does that leave me?” I whined to my father in law, Ken. He’s the poor sod charged with bringing this whole project together because his son-in-law is shite at anything involving moving parts. “We’re okay so long as that one bit holds out? I thought these engines were common. You think they’d still make hoses for them.”
“Don’t panic,” he told me, calmly rolling a cig. There was just a hint of a sigh. His other son-in-law is an electrician. I blog. I suspect mechanics have more in common with electricians. “They make a hose up. You ever seen one of those hoses which is ribbed and you can bend it into whatever shape you like? You just use one of them.”
“Sounds like that’s what I need,” I agreed, partly relieved there was a solution but also partly wondering why I don’t just buy one of them instead of the five he was suggesting. “What’s it called?”
Which is how I came to be standing in the truck parts department of the local Hi-Way 1 Truck Centre with the bloke on the other side of the counter giving me the oddest sort of a look.
Very funny, Ken. I’m assuming this is payment for all the work I’ve had you doing.
Raising a family on little more than laughs