“Are you sure this movie is suitable for the kids?” my wife asked me with more than a hint of skepticism in her voice. It wasn’t the first time she’d asked, nor was it the second. Or third.
In fact, every time someone died, or even nearly died, on screen she tended to get a bit tetchy.
Miss10 wasn’t thrilled either. “You said this was a princess movie,” she accused me. She’s used to Barbie style princesses.
“Trust me,” I said for the umpteenth time. “This movie has a princess. You’ve met her.”
“The farm girl?”
“Even better than a princess,” I continued, ignoring her tone, “it’s also got sword fights, a pirate, a giant,” she looked even more doubtful so I threw in the clincher, “and true love.” I turned my attention to Tracey. “And the DVD says it’s rated PG so it’s all good. Plus I love this movie. It’s perfect for kids. Trust me,” I said again to Miss10. “You’ll love it.”
The Princess Bride is a classic movie which enriched my life as I grew up. I have many fond memories built around this film, mainly involving the word ‘inconceivable’.
“How old were you when you first watched this?” Tracey asked me as a giant rat tried to gnaw a limb off the hero.
I must admit, at this point in the movie I was pleased Miss4 and Miss6 were staying at Grandma’s because there would have been screams instead of the soft whimperings Miss10 and Master8 were producing.
“I don’t know how old I was,” I said. “Ten? Eleven? Twelve?” I did some quick mental maths. The movie came out in 1987, so that would have made me… “Twenty.”
The movie took the heat off me at this point because the bad guys tortured the hero to death.
“Are you sure this is a kids’ movie?” This time it was Miss10 asking. “Her true love is dead. Where’s my happy ending, Dad?”
“It’s okay,” I told her. “It works out.”
“Yes, but he gets better.”
I was saved by, of all things, the hero of yet another great kids’ movie.
“I know that voice!” said Master8 excitedly, his head appearing from behind a blanket for the first time in several minutes.
“Me too!” said Miss10.
“Mike Wazowski!!” they screamed together.
Billy Crystal sure has a great body of work. Thank goodness.
And then, with (apparently) the greatest kiss of all time, the movie ended. When we tucked these two kids into bed they were smiling, although I forgot to ask them if they were pleased with the way the movie ended or simply relieved it was over. I decided on the former.
“See,” I told my wife as we made ourselves a cuppa in the kitchen. “They loved it. It’s a great kids movie.”
“They loved it,” I repeated. “Next I’ll show them Labyrinth and The Last Starfighter and The Dark Crystal-”
“-and Alien and A Nightmare On Elm Street,” cut in Tracey.
She’s not convinced. Mainly, I suspect, about my ability to parent. I further suspect the next Princess movie we watch will star that princess of princesses, Barbie.
Which I find completely inconceivable, but probably unavoidable.
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When not over here, Bruce hangs out at his Big Family Little Income Facebook Page.
”Raising a family on little more than laughs.”