Scatterbrained

Seven kids. It’s a lot, you know. So you think by now I’d have more of an understanding about how the little buggers tick. I don’t.

The kids have wardrobes and boxes full of toys they never touch. Toys, I might add, they chose for themselves and had to have. But instead, what do they play with?

A few weeks ago I noticed the cushions from the lounge room were sitting in the window seat in our bedroom.

“Who’s brought these in here?’ I asked Tracey.

“You kidding me?” she wanted to know. I must have been because she was laughing. There was a pause while I quickly tried to work out the joke. I got squat. “They’ve been in this room since before the baby was born.”

The ‘baby’ turned one in January.

“Well, I’m putting them back where they belong,” I said.

“They’re a nightmare in the lounge room,” Tracey informed me.

“That’s where we bought them for,” I pouted. “I use them to nap on.”

“Clearly.”

Before Miss1 was born? She may have had a point. Still, I was on a mission.

A minute or two later I’d marched all six cushions out of the room and set them up on our lounge, where they were intended to be.

And I’ve been marching them back to the lounge several times a day ever since.

What is it about little square cushions which demands our kids’ attention?

I went to lie down today and watch Rise Of The Guardians with the kids and you know how many cushions I had there to tuck under my head? None, which is short for not a one. Usually there’s several strewn across the floor for me to trip on.

So I went looking. They weren’t in the kitchen or the dining room. They weren’t in our room. They were in Master8’s room. “There’s already several good, head-supporting pillows in his room,” I mentioned to Tracey in what can only be described as an exasperated tone. “What does he need the cushions for?”

“He was using them as stepping stones,” she told me. I am cursed with imaginative children.

But this wasn’t even the only cushion incident today. I sprung Miss1 lying on the kitchen floor using one as a pillow this morning and tonight, when I tried to restore the lounge room to it’s former glory once the kids were asleep, I went hunting and found one on our bed, where there’s so many pillows they’re a safety hazard on the floor if I have to get up in the middle of the night to go pee pee.

So for Christmas this year I’ve written myself a note: everyone gets a cushion.

“You could always just nap on your bed,” suggested Tracey. True, there’s already several good, head-supporting pillows there. But she’s missed the whole point.

“How am I going to pretend to watch the telly with the kids from our bedroom?”

Honestly. Sometimes I think she understands me less than I understand the kids.

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12 Comments

  • Ah yes, the stepping stones. Except my boys use the lounge seat cushions, so I can’t hide them or we wouldn’t be able to sit on the couch at all. I’m forever telling them to put them back, usually five minutes after I finished folding all the washing and left it ready to go in draws on said couch. The clothes look better on the floor anyway.

  • I gave up on lounge cushions long ago. You seriously DO NOT NEED lounge cushions!

    I have two very thrashed out ‘lounge cushions’ left – I use the term “lounge cushions” very loosely – that live most of the time on the floor, hurling through the air of the lounge room, or used in armed combat in said lounge room.

    You do realise if you get them all one each armed combat WILL move into your lounge room? It’s only a matter of time. And with armed combat comes kids flying through the air from the lounge having to throw their cushion whilst airborne… oh yes apparently that’s the best way to hit your target.

    I’m with your wife, put them back in the room. They’re safe there. Everyone is safe with them there.

    The house is safe with them there.

    MC – Mum to six.

  • We already have the cushion problem with the Little Mister at 17 months. It’s been happening for a while now. I desperately want new, fresh, pretty ones for the couch in the main living room, but there truly is no point. Not even a pillow pet can fix the situation. I find him just scooting around with his head on a cushion, butt up and legs pushing…what the hell?
    I think you’re fighting a losing battle!

  • My grand daughter used one to swim across the kitchen Lino on her tummy . Two of the young other people in my house followed suit now thy are not cushions they are boats , fish , dinosaur poo ( true fact) and miniature cubbies for trolls.

  • I’ve never joined a blog before but I am so glad I have discovered yours! I always wanted four kids – all the larger families I grew up around seemed to have so much crazy laughter and fun going on in their homes.. Well, be careful what you wish for I say! I got my longed-for beautiful babies (and I love them of course blah blah blah…) and what I have discovered now is that all my home is full of is a whole lot of mess and one mummy who yells A LOT. Happily, my kids do seem to have a crazy and fun time laughing at me doing a lot of yelling so I don’t think I have ruined them yet. I seriously need to lighten up and let a lot of stuff go (like any hope of clean toilets, carpets or spare inch of space….). I love what I’ve read so far and I think you may just help me hold onto my sanity after all!

    • That’s a lovely comment to leave, thank you LeeLee. We are all about mess and stress here. Not deliberately, of course, but it kind of comes with the territory lol

  • LOL! I agree with Tracey, cushions ARE a nightmare in the lounge room or even on the couch for that matter :). How many times in 20mins can I yell “Why are the cushions on the floor… put them back on the couch!”

    Great post 🙂 🙂

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