Fun With Friends On Facebook

Here’s something I probably shouldn’t admit – I’ll accept just about any friend request which comes my way on Facebook.

Which is probably why I have 1800+ of them.

Jayden K Smith may not be in my friends’ list, but that is only because the scoundrel didn’t attempt to contact me.

Some people spend ages trying to work out who someone is and even then if they want to have them in their feed. I want as many people in my feed as I can scrounge up because, while I try to keep things on my official Big Family Little Income Facebook page light and on topic, on my personal page I tend to get more political and politically incorrect. While I restrain myself to an occasional ‘ranty pants’ post on my blog, on my personal Facebook page I like to shove my opinions down other people’s throats.

To the frustration of many, I’m sure, I have my causes.

Lately, my attention has been firmly focused on marriage equality. And I mean if you’re thinking I’ve been a bit absent on the blog, this is probably the reason. I’ve been on the campaign trail all across the interwebs.

*This was a marathon debate over on Australian Marriage Forum Inc. It was actually really respectful and I enjoyed myself thoroughly. Mainly because I think I won.*

So today, when I got a friend request from one Barron Daniel James, I was thrilled for a bit of a reprieve from all that debating. As you can see in the photo at the top of this post, he was a cheerful looking bloke with a respectable beard but, wonderfully, shared no friends with me.

This usually means one of two things: a reader who’s decided to befriend me personally, which I love, or a scammer with a fake profile.

Fake profiles themselves can fall into a couple of categories, such as someone who is so opposed to my views on SSM – or vaccinations or secularism or safe schools or science & evolution or religion in schools or atheism in general or feminism or the superiority of British humour or any manner of important personal positions I’ve taken – and they want to be able to troll me without me working out who they are (a sensible concern because I am good at this shit and if they’re fat shaming some poor woman I’ve been known to get their Mummy involved), or someone out to try get something out of me by nefarious means.

I don’t mind which, if I’m honest. I love chatting with them all.

Regarding the more sinister types of friend requests (or emails – they’re great fun too), I figure the longer they’re wasting time with me the less damage they’re doing to someone else’s bank account. I almost see it as a civic duty. It’s actually quite good fun, as you can see from this exchange with Barron’s brother-from- another-mother-farker, Barrister.

Unfortunately, Barron Daniel James didn’t want to play very long today. My fault entirely. I called him out too quickly on this odd Michael Jackson thing on his Facebook wall where it was white as Tilda Swinton going back several days to where he changed his profile pic before which it’s all gangsta rap and biatches for a good year of posts.

I guess some friendships just aren’t meant to be.

And I would have left it at that, only a couple of hours later I saw on a friend’s wall he’d been approached by the same guy.

Clearly, this is another one of those scams going through Facebook like colour corrected molasses.

Be aware. Be vigilant.

But most of all, be a pal and suggest he give me another chance.

I have more questions for him.

Specifically about how dedicated he was to his role and if he’d bleached all the way to his chocolate starfish. Photos or it didn’t happen, Barron.